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The kindness trap

Updated: Jan 26, 2023




The kindness traps go along these lines:

"If you are kind to yourself and others you are going to be good"

While I agree with the first part of the sentence - be kind to yourself, I am not so sure how a rigid attitude of kindness towards others is an indication of good mental health.

To be kind toward ourselves make sense to me, just because, for the majority of people, our mind is on the very harsh side. Mine certainly is!

Here are a few common examples of harsh thinking: "I not good at this, I am so bad, I don't look go, I must work hard, I am fat, if other people knew how bad I am, I did not do a good job" etc.

What about kindness towards others?

When I look around, especially at some spirituality-driven contest, the kindness that transpires feels fake to me. I do not perceive authenticity, it is just another way to dissociate from anger, instead of being in touch with it.

I think that there are times in which to tell somebody "f.... You " comes as appropriate, with a peaceful sense of rightness.

Just curious to hear your thoughts

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